Яшенька · 1d
Sometimes with my empathy I fear I am unable to love someone "gently" because I will always be able to recognize their flaws and snub them for it. But still, I love what makes people into people and to deny that would be dishonest. I like to think this is the purest form of love there is. I think love is supposed to hurt, nomatter what form it comes in - as love should always be "honest" and I will always view people with contempt. I think to absolve my lover of that would be to absolve them of what makes them lovable in the first place. I want to know what you think about this (not inherently romantic), as I am thinking about how people seem to idealize their shallow relationships with others to spare their own feelings because they have a need to fill space. Thank you!
I read the other ask you had sent but deleted as well ..
I agree with you. I see this as something negative about me and why I can not maintain relationships nor seek them out. I have a tendency to point out peoples flaws and hold it against them.
I was asked about this on Frag as well since people were questioning past relationships and how I am aromantic.
I am attracted to appearances, yes. I do not date based on appearances, though.
I find people attractive. This is evident especially when it comes to women. I adore the female form and find femininity very attractive.
That is the extent my attraction goes, however.
I don't find personalities attractive. I don't find anything else about people attractive. Not even the thing I adore most about people - their appearance - is enough for me to pursue a relationship.
It's complicated to talk about and I find it weird to be put under a microscope and interrogated as to why I am the way I am when it comes to romances.
I can look at someone and think to myself, ''Wow, they are really gorgeous. I would kill myself if they asked me to'', and that is it.
I guess I have the lens of a determined artist or something. I am just an admirer of beauty.
I could never maintain a relationship even if I was blessed with my 'ideal type'.
I agree that love should be honest. Keeping things secret and holding animosity towards your partner because you do not want to 'ruin' your relationship will always backfire.
Especially when you have disorders that affect your interactions with people.
Not telling your partner whenever they have done something to hurt you and keeping it bottled up until you both argue so then you can bring it up no matter how much time has passed.
It's best to be upfront and unfiltered, I do not disagree with you in the slightest.
But me? No. I just do not think I could ever get myself in a situation like that.
This also applies to friendships anyway, since you also proposed the fact this does not only apply to romantic relationships.
Most friendships are shallow. People are quick to turn on one another online. It's just human nature to betray and deceive. People always want to be seen as in the right. They go with whoever is most virtuous in the moment so they can be pardoned from critique.
Something that never fails to make me laugh is when people fall off with each other and one side begins to crop out of context screenshots of their ex-friend to show others and laugh about it when back then, during the time of that certain conversation, both were engrossed with what was being said. It doesn't matter now, though. They aren't friends anymore so what's the harm in making it seem like the other person was odd and annoying.
Ugh. I never liked them anyway. I was just pretending because I felt bad for them 💦 Here are screenshots of them venting and me cropping out the parts where I was also vulnerable to them and/or showed genuine care to them because now it is cool to hate on this person I used to know.
Does this sound familiar to you?
